Remember the time when you felt like you did something wrong. Okay, I know it’s very frustrated to relive your bad feelings, but for a moment at least recall how you once dealt with it, because that’s the only way to find a better approach to treat your guilt.
Guilt is a message from our emotion to learn from mistake so we would not repeat it. The key lesson learned when you feel “guilty” is being able to recognize “I did something bad”, which is much different than claiming “I am bad”.
Do not hate yourself, hate what you did instead and decide to change or improve from it.
The choice is ours as to whether we bury ourselves in guilt or let it go. It is important to remember that guilt can be a good thing, as an expression of our conscience and its response to the mistakes we make along the way. There is no such thing as a perfect-person, at least not in this day and age. We all have done things we felt guilty about. The problem arises when we cannot move past the guilt or when that guilt brings self-destructive behavior.
Normal ways to deal with Guilt
Below are some proactive thought process and approaches to internalization and self-treatment one could undertake when suffering “guilty” feeling to avoid being overly consumed with such negative emotion that could lead to destructive behaviors:
1. Everybody makes mistakes – sometimes unknowingly, sometimes deliberately. Accept that you did something wrong and then move on.
2. And no one cares. it’s the truth that no one remember your mistakes for long. People are busy caring their own guilts, not yours.
3. Talk to the people who were affected by the event that you feel guilty about and figure out what you can do to compensate.
4. Change our behavior to prevent the same mistake and make it sooner rather than later.
5. Overcome your bad habits of procrastination, perfectionism, over-promise and self-blame, because those might be the causes of your mistakes.
Decoding your guilt
Perfection doesn’t exist. We were not born perfect nor do we die so. On our long journey through life, we make mistakes, we learn, we correct ourselves and move on, yet we are beautiful with our imperfections.
Have you ever heard of Kintsugi? It is a centuries-old art of repairing broken pottery with gold, and it is even more beautiful than the original one. It comes out in a unique way that blows our minds. And what makes it magnificent is that “golden joinery,” the flaws themselves presented in a new beautiful way. The same concept applies as we should learn to forgive others and forgive ourselves. Yearn for our good imperfections, and be proud instead.
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Have a great and mindful journey, dear.