I stared at my broken iphone.
I had smashed it against the wall. The iphone’s screen was broken and I knew it would take quite some money (and some time) to fix it.
But the thing is, if you now ask me why I did it, I can not give a proper answer. I know whom I set my fire on, but I wouldn’t recall the reason. After some time it was too small to ever think about it again.
And that was not the first time I smashed my phone because of trivial reasons.
It was quite stupid, you may say, but we all sacrifice our personal belongings, our own mental stability, our precious relationships, or all of the above, to get over the negative emotions quickly.
We never think of the root cause which triggered us to act like we are the victims of our emotions. We just act whatever that makes us release the bad energy. But you know, there are better ways to treat anger, besides smashing things, punching pillows and shouting in the forest (especially when we don’t live near any forest!).
Normal Ways to Deal with Anger
Here are some tips on how to deal with anger effectively.
- Find relaxation and calmness in visualizing relaxing scenes, bringing to mind your favorite smell, or repeating a few words and phrases that help you change your mood and mindset fast.
- Avoid annoying situations and take some time out to listen to your favorite song or practice a hobby that makes you feel better.
- Avoid contact with people when you realize that your anger triggers are higher than normal. This is considered a good way by experts to avoid those fits of fury you may have.
- Exercise and stay in good physical shape. It has been noticed that people who exercise regularly are more in control of their emotions at all times.
- Practice breathing techniques, yoga or meditation, the proven methods in soothing and calming people down.
- Release aggression and get over negative feelings with humor. Humor is mankind’s greatest blessing.
- Accept people for who they are. It is quite possible that you get angry with people just because they cannot keep up with you or they do not have the qualities you would like them to have. You need to learn to accept people for who they are, or you will end up always feeling angry.
- If you are the sort of person who tends to get violent when you get angry, then you definitely need professional help. Not only are you hurting another person, but you end up feeling like a victim, and this feeling can further fuel your anger.
Although anger as an emotion is not bad, the way people often express this emotion is what’s negative. Most of the time, relationships are shattered because of the way this emotion is unleashed, and sometimes, it can even end up spoiling a person’s life. Most often people resort to anger management programs to help them cope with their anger. These programs teach people how to control their anger, but ultimately, it is up to the individuals as to whether they really want to stay the course and make use of everything they learned. There are some experts who believe that people first have to be willing to change before any anger management program can help them. This means that you will have to take some initiatives to control that existing foul temper. Remember, for any anger management program to be beneficial, you have to want it.
Decoding your anger
Normally, all the common solutions that first come to our minds to cope with anger are to avoid, to suppress, to hold or to resist that destructive feeling. However, we do not realize that anger is a part of us that would eventually resurface no matter how much you attempt to suppress it.
Therefore, we all should learn to embrace anger. Yes, instead of pushing anger away, let’s observe, accept, and embrace anger like a mother nurturing her child. There is no other emotion which is similar to a child than anger. No matter how difficult it seems, a mom would still embrace and comfort her child to relaxation. That is an example of anger being redirected to tranquility. You will be surprised how similar it is when we embrace, treat, and cure our own feeling like it is our child.
Treat anger like it is a part of you by understanding its root cause. Let it become you. After all, it reflects a deep desire of us wanting to confront, to change, to learn, and to protect. Let us be a good filter where all energy from anger is embraced and transformed into a good choice. A good choice doesn’t always mean to be nice and smile, pretending the implosion is not there, but it can also be expressed in a well-aware manner.
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