Each of us once has an idol in our heart. It maybe your father, your mother, or a relative that you always admired in your childhood. Growing up a little to the dreaming age, it could be the excellent artists or actors on screen. After graduation, your idol can be Bill Gates, Steve Jobs, or some famous and rich start-ups. At this point of time, who would that person be?
After thinking a little about the person you want to become, I’ll tell you why this is so important.
We are often told, “Be yourself,” but if you take one moment to think about this, “being yourself” sometimes doesn’t bring you any lasting benefits.
Being ourselves comforts our differences, makes us feel less guilty and embraces the norms. Sometimes we give up a difficult task or a struggle, by telling ourselves that we are different from the other person and no one will understand us. At other times, we reject opportunities because they are not within our expertise, interests or focus.
It is great to “be yourself,” because this is very comfortable and requires nothing more out of you. But if you want more than what you are having, “Being yourself” won’t help you much in the long term.
In fact, being ourselves is nothing but a trick to calm our laziness, failure and mediocrity. As humans, we have unpleasant feelings like fear, anxiety, or frustration, especially when we encounter out-of-control situations, so being ourselves will easily keep us in our comfort zone. If just being ourselves without any effort to improve, how could we ever win that dream job, conquer that hot girl, and live a life of freedom,
Now, go back to the person you want to become. It could be a celebrity, a moneyed man, or yourself in a better version: richer, freer, healthier, more beautiful than you are now.
Meanwhile the “Be yourself” taps into the present, sometimes awful present, thinking about the “idol you want to be” taps into our potential, our future, our becoming. It encourages doing new things, connecting our dots and knowing our core. It urges the need of renovating ourselves again and again throughout the life’s journey. Old ways don’t open new doors.
Then, what are the first steps in determining your idol?
1. Answer the question: “Who has inspired you, and how?” This will help you to easily navigate to a role model you have ever had in your mind, and compare it with the experience and emotions you’ve encountered. “Inspiration” is an important motivation because it has the power to go directly into your emotions and wills, as well as nursing you with positive energy. Your inspiration may be temporary, but the person who inspired you is definitely a firm believer in his path. Understanding his motivation and how he influenced you can make you understand more about your “idol person”.
2. Answer the question: “How do you want to be remembered when you die?” This will help you understand which way of living is truly yours. The answer will carry the traits of who you want to be. There are people who want to leave as many accomplishments behind, there are people who value their families, and there are as well people who prefer nothing but an ordinary life. There is no right answer, but the answer closest to your heart.
3. Answer the question: “What are you best at?” This question goes straight to reality, because you can compare your strengths with the idol person, as well as the strategies and action plans you need to make to close that gap. List 3-5 points, don’t underestimate the fifth strength, though it may seem small, you always have a chance to develop it in the future.
Each question can take from 15 minutes to half an hour or more depending on each person. But try to answer them, sometimes your answers will surprise you.
Hope I can inspire you a bit today <3
Have a good day.